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Posts Tagged ‘worry’

If you looked up ‘Worry’ in the dictionary there I would be, because that is seriously what I do day and night.  It can range from something little to something big, but if I have nothing to worry about then I’m sure to find something soon enough otherwise even that would make me worry!

I know that everyone worries about different things, but I really do think that I take it to the extreme.

When I eventually go to bed at night I lay there thinking for an hour or so about everything before I can even think about closing my eyes to go to sleep.  I worry about anything and everything.  From small things like wondering if I’ve checked the oven etc is turned off, (even though I’ve checked at least 3 times before bed), to appointments which could be in a weeks time, but I’m already stressed out about it in case I can’t park to get there or I’ve got the wrong day and time.

I worry that people are looking at me, even though logically there would be no reason for them to more than anyone else.  I worry about the school run everyday when I’m struggling to get all 3 kids in the car and I can see people behind me waiting tapping there fingers.  I worry that people don’t really like me but feel they have to talk to me in certain situations just to be polite.  I worry maybe I don’t pay enough attention to each of my boys individually and when they grow up they’ll resent me for it.  I worry about the queue that always seems to be waiting behind me in the shop when I’m trying to pack my bags and things are tipping out because they’re so full…  The list is honestly endless but each thing is as much of a worry to me than the next.  In fact, sometimes I’m physically sick with worry.

I swear my head will explode the amount of things that I think about altogether at the same time. My OCD really doesn’t help the situation either.  That is a totally different topic though which I’m not sure I’m brave enough to share yet for the fear of people thinking I should be locked up!

The one thing I really hope for is that my boys never worry like I do because I’m sure I do enough worrying on their part anyway, and at 27 I already have the grey hairs to prove it too!